A Very Lucky Girl

All is quiet in Bachelor mansion land the morning following Alayah’s departure. Four women snuggle on the pool-side patio and hope to leave all of the drama behind this week. Chris Harrison steps outside to invite the ladies in for a biscuit brunch. He recognizes that the past few days have been interesting, but assures the remaining women that Peter is serious about this journey and seriously believes his wife is here. However, it’s time to pack up and meet Peter in beautiful, amazing, and exotic:  Cleveland, Ohio! Crickets.  The ladies struggle to get excited for this mid-western treasure, but dutifully repack their luggage. Hannah Ann fights to fit her Revolve wardrobe winnings into her two allocated suitcases.  Peter rejoices in the scenery change, especially since he’s in the birthplace of Superman! The fictional character of Clark Kent was born in Cleveland! Ohio’s tourism industry must be struggling, because this episode is clearly sponsored....

We pick up where we left off in Rhode Island with the Luke showdown. Hannah is confused and fed up with hearing the Lukes discuss each other and asks them to sit down and talk to each other. She wants to hear what’s going on. Luke S accuses Luke P of sabotage and that he is not trustworthy. Luke P continues to accept zero responsibility for his lies. Hannah’s boredom with the entire conversation increases by the second, until she gets up and walks away. Luke S rests his head in his hands, defeated by the classic narcissist. Chris Harrison announces the conclusion of the cocktail party and the imminent rose ceremony. Hannah’s suitors are frustrated and blame Luke P for their lack of time with Hannah this evening. They all cut him off when he tries to speak in his defense. A gentleman I’ve literally never seen on camera until this instant narrates the options: Luke P could go home. Luke S could go home. Both Lukes could go home or both Lukes could stay. Thank you, stra...

source Hannah Beast is on the prowl to find the man who will choose her everyday and I. Am. Here. For. It. Last week, ABC invited all former Bachelorettes to Los Angeles in exchange for a small check and a guaranteed surge in Instagram followers. From Trista to Becca, the ladies chatted about the men they share (looking at you Emily & Becca #vroomvroom) and the families many of the women are creating. Meanwhile, Chris Harrison flexed his skills as a tour guide and directed a bus filled with fans around iconic LA Bachelor spots before inviting them inside Bachelor Mansion. I had serious FOMO as fans mingled in the infamous sunken living room with the likes of Ali Fedotowsky and Ashley Hebert -- how do I score an invite to the next one!? Hannah Beast was filming her own season during this reunion so she could not take part for obvious reasons, but FINALLY Monday, May 13th was upon us and my Monday nights are void no longer. First, we pick up where we left off in Tuscal...