A Very Lucky Girl

Chris Harrison introduces the show, promoting the competition for money and suggesting that participants "may even hook up and fall in love." Because falling in love is a direct result of hooking up...has anyone found this to be true? Please share if so. We get a close view of some the contestants. Chris from Emily's season mopes on a leather couch about his pathetic love life and ABC finds it necessary to get several shots of that. Horseless Lindzi recognizes that she lost to Courtney on Ben's season, but admits that she has gained the bonus of not trusting anyone. ABC therapists have their work cut out for them. Reid is from Jillian's season. I don't know who he is but he's adorable. Ed is from Jillian's season, her ex-fiance to be exact. He confesses to cheating scandals that ended their year-long engagement, but blames his infidelity on his hesitance to commit. I wonder what to blame his white pants on.We all fondly remember Blakely as the ...

Sorry it took me so long to post this! I didn't get a chance to watch it until Saturday while i was dog sitting devil puppies. I have broken up about 3 fights and one of the dogs has ripped up faux decorative apples. Fun Fact: there's a dead mouse in one of these walls. Can absolutely smell it. It's absolutely disgusting. Mmm decomp. I loooove Men Tell All! Especially on a season that lacked spice because of Emily's blandness. Chris Harrison introduces the show by asking if we are all on the edge of our seats to see Emily find the love of her life. Ehh, I'm honestly iffy. I am, however, thrilled to see all the women in America throw themselves at Emily's sloppy seconds. Chris also pronounces finale (FIN-AL-EE) like FIN-ALL-EE. Stop that. Has he done this every season? I need to pay more attention. As we relive the season for the bazillionth time we get to see a clumsy Emily spill wine all over her favorite prom dress and curse about it. Top 3 favorite moment o...

I'm relying on my memory of this episode because I just do not have time to rewatch and take notes. Especially if I want this recap debuting before next Monday night.  Ricki is going to be one of the most well-traveled six year olds in Charlotte, NC by the time this show is over. From Bermuda, she and mom jet off to London (probably in a helicopter). Sean receives date card number one and wanders around London with Emily. They are obnoxious tourists, probably even more so with the camera crew following every move, and likely ended up alienating any pro-American sentiment with Sean's impromptu speech on Speaker's Corner. He rambles on for several agonizing minutes about love, which translated to a giant ticking biological clock in Emily's mind for she immediately brings up her love of brats at the dinner table. C'mon Emily, let's be a lady and save that talk for never? You've made your point. Your uterus is apparently starving.  The group date mercifully ...

Emily kicks off Week Four with a description of Bermuda. Her adjective of choice? "Cute." Tropical islands are just SO adorable. Doug is given the one-on-one date (or real-life date, if you prefer). He makes a great impression by telling her cleavage that it "looks very pretty." Emily takes a lull in the conversation to express her surprise at how she really likes it here! I mean, I was worried she was going to hate it...weren't y'all? Emily makes a giant deal of this wishing arch and confides her wish in all of America (which means it's definitely not coming true), telling us that she wished she wouldn't be single forever. Dream big, Em. Emily sees Doug as "too perfect" but his inner Hannah Montana kicks in and he promises that "nobody's perfect!" She continues to press him for faults and he valiantly tries to think of something to satisfy her. But comes up blank. Because, obviously, he's just too good to be true. ...

Monday night at 8 pm I was frantically driving through the streets of Norman, searching for the designated Bachelorette viewing area where Savannah anxiously awaited my arrival. I had been hanging out with Tyler (I tried to surprise him, but that was an epic fail. He was nice enough to pretend that I succeeded) and understandably lost track of time. Before I knew it, Emily was about to go on her first date of the season and I was about to miss it! I slid into my spot on the couch mid-date, to Savannah's intense disappointment. Ryan received the first date card. Susan admitted that he reminds her of a Labrador, as in the dog. Something about his boring-ness? Personally, I think the unexcitement of his date with Emily infiltrated his personality. Not his fault! They baked cookies and went to Rickii's soccer practice (Ricki being her daughter; all I can think about when I see her name is the story "Rikki-tiki-tavi"). After she showed off her soccer mom skills they wen...

Any guesses as to where I was Monday night at 8:30 when Emily made her dating debut? Not in front of the TV. I got the chance to hang out with Tyler so obviously I took it! Instead I hung out with 2,000 other Thunder fans in Thunder alley, urging on the storm that devastated those Lakers. Sucks to suck. But of course I made sure that Bachelorette was set to record before I left the house. Unfortunately, that plan was not foolproof for I received this heart-attack inducing text as soon as we arrived at Thunder alley. All hell almost broke loose. Thankfully, I was able to convince Paul to record it for me, but sadly there was a glitch and neither television housed my show when I settled down to watch it on Tuesday night. Thank God for Hulu! #problemsolver Savannah and Susan treated me to some spoiler texts. What sweethearts. But I truly hoped that half were false, because as much as I dislike Emily, no one deserves the kinds of guys they were insisting starred in the show. First ...