A Very Lucky Girl

All is quiet in Bachelor mansion land the morning following Alayah’s departure. Four women snuggle on the pool-side patio and hope to leave all of the drama behind this week. Chris Harrison steps outside to invite the ladies in for a biscuit brunch. He recognizes that the past few days have been interesting, but assures the remaining women that Peter is serious about this journey and seriously believes his wife is here. However, it’s time to pack up and meet Peter in beautiful, amazing, and exotic:  Cleveland, Ohio! Crickets.  The ladies struggle to get excited for this mid-western treasure, but dutifully repack their luggage. Hannah Ann fights to fit her Revolve wardrobe winnings into her two allocated suitcases.  Peter rejoices in the scenery change, especially since he’s in the birthplace of Superman! The fictional character of Clark Kent was born in Cleveland! Ohio’s tourism industry must be struggling, because this episode is clearly sponsored....

Last week’s champagne-fueled fiasco paused on Kelsey boohooing in the bathroom. She’s now changed locations for her sob-fest and perches on the front porch instead. Hannah Ann is emotional in the back courtyard: “why would I steal champagne?” she squeaks out. Champagne-gate is still on.  Apparently Victoria P received the one-on-one date card sometime the night before, but all available cameras were occupied with Hannah Ann and Kelsey so we are expected to roll with this unexpected turn of events. Peter and Vicky P drive a vintage pick-up truck to an empty western apparel store in Peter’s hometown. They test the line dancing capability of a few pairs of boots, before selecting some cowboy hats to go with the fancy new footwear. They are ready to visit Peter’s local hangout: The Canyon. A live band performs and they join the dancing crowd before taking a breather to hit the bar where Victoria orders a white wine after adamantly declaring her love of reds during their truck ...