Saturday, April 14, 2012

Imperfect Love


I've recently been consumed by the idea of selfless love. Two different books I've been reading have a theme of love, "The End of the Affair" by Graham Greene and "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller. All of the characters in Greene's novel are depicted as selfish humans only capable of loving in a way that's easy for them. They love in a greedy form versus loving for someone else's benefit. 


Miller recognizes the worldly perspective on love as being able to die for something or someone. But he then counters with, "living for something...is the hard thing. Living for something extends beyond fashion, glory, or recognition." Living for someone is the ultimate sacrifice because it involves daily death to your own selfish desires. 


I've been trying to practice real love. It doesn't come naturally. My first instinct is to look out for myself and my best, or easier, interests. I need to actively listen to what my friends have to say, even if I deem the situation inconsequential and am in the middle of an intense How I Met Your Mother episode. Showing that I care by being interested and invested in the lives of others is more important than Ted's never ending quest for love (I'm halfway through season 2 and he has yet to meet their mother, I sense faulty advertising). Advocating selfless love doesn't guarantee reciprocation. I can't please everybody and I can admit that it bothers me when I try, and get the proverbial little "k" in response (burn a few extra calories and type out the entire word, alright?). 


Selfless love is being happy for someone even when your own happiness falters because of their decision. Selfless love is putting on a smile even when the love of your life finds what they were looking for in someone else. Selfless love is active and energetic, ready at a moment's notice. Selfless love ascribes and demonstrates value to a difficult individual. I hope to someday get there. In time, I could be a A Very loving Lucky Girl. 

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