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Showing posts from June, 2018

The Beccachelorette Week Five: Vegas Vibes

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source It's time to gamble on love in Vegas, baby! Becca struts The Strip, reminiscing on her trust issues and modeling in front of the Bellagio fountain. Someone put on her confidence this morning. Meanwhile, her suitors are exploring their Aria Skysuite and can't even handle their sweet new digs. Harrison called in for a sick day, so Becca greets her own boyfriends from the second level balcony of their suite. She announces it's going to be a busy week before making her exit. Ding Dong Date Card: "Colton, let's ride off into the sunset together." Colton is jazzed and looking forward to some quality time. They climb aboard camels and lumber their way into the desert to their oasis: a strategically positioned hot tub that the intern found on a Nevada garage sale site. Despite being in the middle of the desert with the sun beating down, the hot tub is on and they continue to exchange body heat by snuggling. Becca is the most relaxed and sweaty she

The Beccachelorette Week 4: Everybody Hates Jordan

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source We find ourselves in the Bachelor mansion just before the Rose Ceremony that ABC so rudely cut short last week. Blake takes some time with Becca to cheer her up after Clay's departure. They plan for a future family. Becca is on board for 3 kids but Blake thinks he may want 5. He's also not the one giving birth so maybe Becca should have veto power on this one. They both love boy names for girls and toss around Stevie and Charlie. Jordan sips his champagne while waiting for his turn with Becca. He thinks his outfit choice of no tie and top two buttons undone shows Becca that he is wild and up for anything. Becca, clued into his wild and up-for-anything vibe, gifts him her extra pair of sheeny gold shortie shorts (she wore the silver ones on the dodgeball date, remember?). David grabs an Uber back from the hospital to show off his newly rearranged face. Determined to snag a pity rose, he shoos away the intern who offers him a pair of scissors for his hospital brace

The Beccachelorette Week 3: Where the Words are Made Up and the Models Don't Matter

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source This post is a couple days behind due to a mid-week work trip to Chicago, but what this post lacks in timeliness it makes up for in terms of quotability.   Becca's boys hang out in sweatsuits and whip up breakfast. Despite the casual attire, Chris Harrison is just happy to see that Jordan is wearing clothes this morning after his stripper move the night before. Harrison announces that there will be two group dates and a single one on one date. He drops off the first date card and is on his merry way.  "Wills, Jason, Jordan, David, Jean Blanc, and Colton-it's time to relax." After Tia-gate, Colton is happy, relieved, and excited to be on this group date. He shouldn't be. The group jumps into a luxury bus, while Becca sets up a brunch spread fit for a queen. 5 in particular-Baby Bekah, Sienne, Kendall, Tia, and Caroline. Becca asks Tia a bit about Colton right off the bat and Tia can't help but assume that Colton thought Tia was going to be the

The Beccachelorette Week 2: We Have a Naked Male Model

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source I promise you that the title isn't click bait. We will discuss the naked male model in just a few too short paragraphs. Night one is over and Becca is officially back on the bicycle of dating. To further illustrate this point, she takes a bike on a spin around the Bachelor mansion neighborhood, ringing her little bell for joy. While this spectacle occurs, the men are waking up, enjoying the view, and feeling hashtag blessed.  Harrison strides into the living room and reminds the men that Becca isn't here to play games and they should take advantage of the time they receive with her. He drops off date card number one before making his exit.  "Clay, Nick, Chris R, David, Jean-Blanc, Jordan, Connor, and Lincoln--I'm ready for my big day." A limo takes the group to Saddlerock Ranch in Malibu where Lincoln claws his way to be the first out of the limo to hug Becca. Take note, this is classic ABC foreshadowing. Becca is wearing bridal white and invites