Thursday, October 24, 2013

10 Things Thomas Rhett Can Do With His Hands

"Well I smoke and I fish
But not near enough to satisfy an itch
Aw but girl understand 
I need something to do with my hands
I don't work on a car
And I'm as bad at pool
As I am at throwing darts
And golf, not a fan
I need something to do with my hands

So maybe I can stick 'em in your pockets

Run 'em through your hair
And we can get to rockin'
There you are and baby here I am
And I need something to do with my hands"

Thomas Rhett, artist of the country hit, "Something To Do With My Hands," is at a loss. And, though he seems to think I do, this girl does NOT understand. As catchy as the tune may be, I do not accept responsibility for providing an activity for Mr. Rhett's appendages. He may not "stick 'em" in my pockets or "run 'em" through my hair. 
Instead, he may do any of the following:
  1. Make me a sandwich
  2. Write a 5,000 word essay about the rape culture we live in and the harm a song like this can do
  3. Write a healthier song
  4. Buy me concert tickets to see Luke Bryan
  5. Read "A Room of One's Own" by Virginia Woolf
  6. Pray
  7. Fill my gas tank
  8. Work on his pool and dart game
  9. Drive himself off a cliff
  10. Stick them in his own pockets and sew 'em shut
A Very Lucky Girl is appalled at his audacity to suggest a female should occupy his hands.  Denied. 

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