Sunday, July 28, 2013

Remember that time I turned 21?

SO DO I. And that's the best part about it! I am in awe of my own awesome-ness. I recap a television show every week, but let's BIRTHDAYCAP! 
The hours leading up to midnight on July 1 passed.so.slowly. 
I donned a striped dress and headed to Megan's, ready to begin the festivities. Hannah, Megan, and I headed down to Edna's, a bar in Oklahoma City famous for their "lunchbox" drinks. We arrived a few minutes to midnight and were just in time for me to down a free Scooby Snack birthday shot. I followed the shot with a Lunchbox, an Adios Motherf*cker, a Fireball, and another free Washington Apple Shot from super short David The Bartender. 
And this is when I learned strangers in bars will ask the most inappropriate questions. I quickly caught onto the "turn and ignore" strategy. 
Leaving Edna's in my more than slightly inebriated state, I mistook a taxi for a cop and grew nervous. I don't know what about, I'M 21 AND INVINCIBLE OBVIOUSLY. 
Hannah and Megan reassured me that the lighted vehicle was a taxi and, true to our tradition, drove to the nearest iHop. 
I requested toast from the waitress. Just toast. For once in my life, bacon did NOT sound appealing. As we waited for our meal I observed, "Yeah. I wouldn't ask for a shot at iHop. I'd ask for a syrup shot or something."
Finally, my bread arrived. With unnecessary sides of jelly. I politely tossed the jelly packets at the guys at the table next to us. One of the gentlemen returned the throw and I corrected his appalling behavior with "Hey bro. Don't regift. That's rude."
I spent most of my actual Monday birthday drinking water and watching Netflix in preparation for the night ahead. We took the party to Norman, after receiving some thoughtful gifts of a wine glass, a liquor bouquet, and a bedazzled vodka bottle from Megan. 
I ordered my favorite Crimson&Cream at Fuzzy's before heading to the liquor store to make my first purchase. After perusing the aisles, I settled on a 4-pack of bottled Jack&Coke. I regret nothing. 
I cracked one open with my new jeweled bottle-opener ring as I waited for Megan and Hannah to finish making my birthday sign list. 
The martini glass around my neck was full of tasks. I completed nearly everything. But we'll get to that.
Dinner at Seven47 was capped off with an HBD shot before we revisited Fuzzy's for another shot and a giant water cup. Hannah made sure I dutifully sipped water in between every adult beverage. 
O'Connells is where most of the damage was done. I took 8 shots in the course of our few hours there. Among them was Patron, an Irish car bomb, and Rumplemintz. Between my bouts of liquid courage fortification, I requested Wannabe by the Spice Girls, danced on an elevated surface, played a drinking game, took a picture with the bartender, sang the Friends theme song, announced my presence, sang to a girl in the street, and ran after a stranger shouting, "But you're my lobster!" I checked things off my task list left and right. 
We entered Logan's next. And I think my friend Savannah said it best in her description of this bar. "If you remember you went to Logan's you had a bad night." It is probably my LEAST favorite place on Campus Corner. But that didn't stop me from sipping a Sex on the Beach and taking a free mystery shot (if you've been tallying, my shot count was 11 at this point). 
A nearly empty Seven47 was our last stop where I partook in my favorite Frozen Bull and tried the Skyy club special before trekking to Hunt's house for beer pong. 
Tyler singlehandedly beat Hannah and I (probably my fault) and I wearily sunk into a chair (6 drinks and 11 shots really takes it out of a girl!). 
And the next thing I knew I was waking up on the couch on Tuesday morning with headache the size of Antarctica. 
I've been told I said and did a few funny things after falling asleep in the chair (including attempting to get into a stranger's parked and locked Corvette multiple times). So a black out did occur. But I never had to use the thoughtful Barf Bucket Megan put together for me, complete with Saltines, a toothbrush, and hairties!
C'mon guys, cheers to A Very Lucky Girl! VOMIT FREE SINCE '13!

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