A Very Lucky Girl

I saw a wasp in my room the other day. I've been stung before by the pesky creatures. Five times at once, to be exact. I was running under a playground slide when I was 7 or 8 and accidently bumped the nest with my head. There ensued an angry chase. I wasn't fast enough.  So imagine my intense discomfort at the sight of one of those guys in my place of sleep. But this was not your normal, several centimeters large wasp. This was a trackerjacker. I was Katniss, this was the hunger games, and I didn't want to meet an end like Glimmer's.  So when the insect flew into the closet I promptly shut the door and decided the clothes already on my floor would have to do for the next few days. The thing could sit in the dark and think about whose space it had invaded. And hopefully starve. But it didn't starve. Days later, I bravely rummaged through my closet, packing clothes for Norman and Houston, and ran into the sucker. I grabbed the nearest flip flop, summoned my dragon...

I truly have negative time to watch, let alone write about, the first week of the "two week Bachelorette finale, most dramatic ever" tonight! I'm so very sorry, but I think I have some good reasons.  This week is one of the busiest of my entire summer. My dad moves to Houston on Wednesday morning so I want to be free just in case I have any extra time to spend with him before he leaves me in Oklahoma. So much sad face.  I work Monday through Thursday and leave for Vegas at 7:05 PM on Thursday evening. I'm hoping to find some time to pack on Tuesday night.  This is the last week of my online Sociology of Gender class and we have a test I need to take between Thursday morning and Friday night. I'm hoping to squeeze it in between work and leaving for the airport on Thursday. Studying will have to be done while the kids have swim practice on Tuesday and Wednesday.  I'll see Tyler for the last time for two weeks in Norman on Wednesday night and also need to pic...

SO DO I. And that's the best part about it! I am in awe of my own awesome-ness. I recap a television show every week, but let's BIRTHDAYCAP!  The hours leading up to midnight on July 1 passed.so.slowly.  I donned a striped dress and headed to Megan's, ready to begin the festivities. Hannah, Megan, and I headed down to Edna's, a bar in Oklahoma City famous for their "lunchbox" drinks. We arrived a few minutes to midnight and were just in time for me to down a free Scooby Snack birthday shot. I followed the shot with a Lunchbox, an Adios Motherf*cker, a Fireball, and another free Washington Apple Shot from super short David The Bartender.  And this is when I learned strangers in bars will ask the most inappropriate questions. I quickly caught onto the "turn and ignore" strategy.  Leaving Edna's in my more than slightly inebriated state, I mistook a taxi for a cop and grew nervous. I don't know what about, I'M 21 AND INVINCIBLE OBVIOUSLY...

Welcome to the week of the show where the men tell all they can contractually reveal. Which usually isn't much. I was thoroughly confused considering Men Tell All is typically sandwiched after fantasy suites and in between the finale. The reunion of Des and her second runner up guy is made 10x awkwarder since they've seen each other naked. Unfortunately, due to extreme drama next week, we didn't get the uncomfortable scenario this season. Harrison introduces himself like I don't know his first and last name and his relationship history like the back of my hand. Want to know a secret? It's probably one of my top five dreams to have Harrison and the Bachelor/ette of the season to crash my watch party. Except instead of houses full of 40+ people, my Monday nights consist of me, my couch, my dog, and my computer. Des might not like witnessing my snarky note-taking.  To prep for the big MTA event, Des sits down with previous bachelorettes (Emily, Ashley, and Ali) to ...

I spent a glorious, humidity-filled week in Louisiana in the middle of July. The entire experience was a lovely time with family I don't get to see frequently, but I wanted to share the highlights! The festivities began after a luxurious emergency exit aisle plane ride where I was seated adjacent to an amorous couple in the sickeningly same salmon hue. I tried to catch most of my vomit in the pages of Skymall, the magazine selling everything I never knew I wanted. My cousins, Katherine and Caroline, picked me and my polka-dot suitcase up at the New Orleans airport on Sunday afternoon. I ate and shopped my way through the city the next two days, visiting the French Quarter (at high tide thanks to unexpected showers), Cafe Du Monde, and Hard Rock Cafe on Bourbon Street. Mix the activities with a few episodes of Friends and late night meaningful conversations, and I had a thoroughly wonderful time with the cousins I hadn't seen in years! Mimi and Didi arrived on Tuesday morning ...

I saw a pin on Pinterest about a year or so ago about a woman who saved five dollar bills in a jar for a year. Every single fiver she received in change or whatever, she saved. Never spent. She ended up with enough money to take a luxurious vacation, just from the fives she saved instead of spending. I decided to take a cue from her in November. I started saving every five from my Fuzzy's tip money, every five I was given in change from a cashier. I've saved at least six hundred dollars this way. Sometimes I get frustrated when I pay with a twenty dollar bill and receive multiple fives in change. But then...that money is still going to be doing something good for me. Just not immediately. The principle of delayed gratification is important to me.  Every five that has touched my hands in the past 8-9 months has gone straight to savings.  A Very Lucky Girl is a saving addict and proud of this self-instilled habit. 

Hometown dates are back. The karma ship has come full circle since Sean Lowe's season, as this was the episode Des herself was sent home on during her stint as a lady vying for his attention. Hartsock travels around America to interact with the men and their families, starting with... Zak: The naked guy drinking beer on his balcony from Mico, Texas has come a long way from shirtless night one. He begins their date in the park and shares a dream he had with her: he and Des melting into the sand, then it starts snowing and they eat the ice crystals, and then lots of kids run out of nowhere. Des is confused, but humors his train of thought, and is rewarded with a part time job in the family snowcone business. I suppose Zak's dream was supposed to be a metaphor for this activity. After hyping up several children and watching her boyfriend dance around in a penguin suit...Des meets the family. Mom (Maryann) actually SKIPS over to hug Des, while the rest of Zak's family is sl...

As promised, Tyler took one for the team last night. Boyfriend of the year award. Boyfriend of the CENTURY award. He emailed me his Bachelorette recap last night and so, with some minor revisions, I present his uncensored opinions on Des and her men: At 6:30 I made a quick and necessary trip to Starbucks down Main street to get some espresso in my system for the task I had at hand. I arrived at my house, sat on the floor, opened my Mac, tuned the television to channel 705 (roses HAVE to be in HD), sipped on the mocha, and cranked up the surround sound.  I knew it was going to be a good night. This week’s episode is set in Madeira, a small island off of the Northwestern coast of Portugal. Des’s first comment about the island is “I feel like I’m on the edge of the world.” Apparently she’s a little behind... The earth is round, sweetheart. She and the remaining guys dock in the port and head their separate ways. Des meets up with three former castmates...

I'm on a break from work. And it's glorious. We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time. It's miserable and magical, oh yeah. Miserable meaning my income has significantly decreased. To about zero. But being free from most obligations and being 21 is a magical time. So much so that I'm not sure how much I'll be updating A Very Lucky Girl. I hate to stop completely, but I cannot promise consistent posts for the next week or two. I will be traveling and starting my second online course of the summer.  I can, however, promise to provide a wonderful recap for The Bachelorette next week. Tyler has graciously volunteered to watch on my behalf and write a review using his uncensored thoughts. I am just as excited to read it as the rest of you.  Also coming soon, when I have a few spare seconds to write, a full report of my 21st birthday and one of my favorite habits I've instituted since last October/November-ish.  A Very Lucky Girl is taking a br...

This, ladies & gentlemen, is the CliffsNotes version of a Bachelorette recap. I watched on Hulu this morning because when the show aired on my 21st birthday I was just taking my first shot of the night. There were several more. Which means I couldn't focus on this trainwreck of a week in Barcelona, Spain Des is in love with Spain. It is the "perfect place to fall in love." Just like Germany before. And Atlantic City before that. The guys sit at school desks, toasting to hoodies and free plane rides, while Chris Harrison announces the week plan. There will again be no cocktail party so the men are instructed to use their time wisely with Des.  Date Card Number One: Drew His dimples kill me. I could eat icing out of them with a baby spoon. SO PRESH. He starts off the date with their first kiss. Just to get that pesky thing outta the way. Raindrops fall, but never fear, Drew whips out his plaid umbrella to shelter dear Des. They share good conversation and half of...