Posts

Showing posts from January, 2017

2nd Episode, 2nd Base: Bachelor Recap Week Two

Week two opens with the woman toasting with mimosas mere hours after the longest night of their lives. I wish they would've shared. I learned far too late into this episode that an entire bottle of wine would've gone a long way to making it more bearable. #allthecringing Chris Harrison swoops into the estrogen-infested living room to inform the 22 women remaining that there will be two group dates and a one on one date this week. He grabs his paycheck on his way out the door. Spoiler alert: we won't be seeing him again until next week.  ding dong date card! Corinne, Vanessa, Sarah, Alexis, Haley, Lacey, Brittany, Jasmine, Raven, Danielle L, Taylor, Elizabeth W.: Always a bridesmaid... Corinne raises the 56th red flag by announcing that she has never been a bridesmaid. Probably because she alienates any women that may have considered it. The women, with their perfectly coiffed hair, hop into 3 blue sports cars and follow google maps to the designated location (cursing Ha

4th Time On National Television is the Charm: Bachelor Recap Week One

Once upon a time I told anyone that would listen that I was not going to watch The Bachelor this season, much less blog about it, because Nick Viall is a terrible person. But here we are. Peer pressure is real.  For those of you who don't know, Nick Viall (pronounced vile rather than the city in Colorado) is making his fourth appearance on national television in what we can all hope is his final attempt to "find love." So far he has found three ex-girlfriends and 8 bottles of tequila in paradise. He was on Andi's season, Kaitlyn's season, and Bachelor in Paradise. As he prepares for this journey (which he has now packed for FOUR times, what on earth does this dude do for a living?), he hangs out with his 10 siblings and muses, "I don't have care how many times I have to go on TV  try!"  Before the big opening night, previous Bachelors Sean Lowe, Ben Higgins, and Chris Soules bro out in California sunshine. Whose idea was it to put the albino f